How to get intimacy into marriage? This will interest all married or partnered men who haven’t been intimate with their dear wives or partners for years and don’t know how to bring intimacy into the marriage or partnership again even if they dearly love the ladies of their lives. Married men who most likely “solve” the problem by paying a lot of time, money, and energy to prostitutes who don’t give them intimacy either while the men could pay that time, money, and energy to rekindling the magic with the loves of their lives. The intimately frustrated married man for long years knows well that the adult industry doesn’t solve his problem and may even have learnt this fact the hard way before he came to my website!
I often hear men say that “but my wife doesn’t have a strong sex drive”. Gentlemen, remember that a woman does not need sex as much and often as a man. A woman can be without sex for long and not miss it. That’s a fact of life – women are wired differently. But when you get a woman into it, she’ll last longer than you, because that is another difference between the sexes. So don’t worry about her sex drive. Worry about getting her into it. And there are ways to do so. Consistently apply these tips and be patient. You’ll see that she will change and intimacy will come back to you. The good news is that it is very easy to begin. Start on the levels of environment and behaviour. They are the easiest to change and can have the strongest impact.
How to get intimacy into marriage or partnership
1. Buy several pillar candles and place them on the dinner table and in the bedroom. Start lighting a candle for dinners. It’s a small gesture of something very profound. Again, think how this small change to your daily dinner would make you feel if someone did it to you. You’ll then know exactly how it will feel to wifey!
2. Buy some ecological and romantic form of room fragrance – an oil burner and oils to burn in it or incense sticks are best. Burn the fragrance in the evenings when you and she are at home together.
3. Start buying your lady little gifts. Chocolate, flowers, a candle, her favourite tea… the little daily things that she likes. Little inexpensive things. I don’t know a person who doesn’t like getting presies, especially if they’re a total surprise out of the blue – spontaneous on an ordinary day, not conditioned by holidays. These gifts will make a tremendous impact and would to you if you received them!
4. Start doing small acts of service for her that you haven’t done for years. Example: make her coffee or tea or make the bed… something small mundane like that.
5. Start touching her daily. Examples: touch her shoulder when passing her, put your hand on her thigh when sitting with her, stroke her hair while passing her once in a while, or something like that. A small touch in passing during the day. Nothing sexual yet.
6. When you thank her for having done or helped you with something, kiss her on the cheek or forehead or stroke her hair. This is another small gesture that will go a long way.
7. Celebrate Valentine’s Day. Light all those pillar candles that you placed around the bedroom on Valentine’s evening and do your best to go to bed at the same time as she. If you start touching her during the day on the day after reading this, you’ll have been touching her for some time by the next Valentine’s Day. That will have prepared the perfect ground for cuddling up to her in the candlelight on Valentine’s eve. Just cuddle up, nothing sexual at this point, and tell her that you’ve loved her for all the years while you weren’t intimate and will always love and protect her. You realized how much you missed the intimacy and would love to rekindle the magic that drove you to the altar or life together if you are not married. While telling her this just stroke her hair, shoulder, or upper arm – you get the point. And see how her heart will start melting… and even if Valentine’s eve doesn’t bloom into making love at full steam, you’ll have gone a long way.
8. Take up dancing together. Dancing returns magic to couples like nothing else! It’s not surprising when we think about it: Where do most people go to get sex for one night? To nightclubs! Why? Because the atmosphere of the flickering disco lights, rhythm pumping through the body, sexy movements of sexily dressed bodies, and the steam from the DJ’s steam machine turn us on. And so it therefore is that most relationships formed in nightclubs don’t last because they’re based on sex and carnal attraction. But dance is making love to music. It indeed takes two to tango. It teaches both dancers to lead and follow, to attune to each other – a powerful metaphor for life in partnership. Dance is a form of art which both dancers create. And we’re satisfied and happy when we create. Hence dance makes us happy. Go dancing regularly – once in two weeks. Make dancing an activity to look forward to.
And finally…
Try these ways and these ways may well inspire you to invent other ways. And you are always welcome to tell me about your progress. A companion in the true sense of the word, and especially a goodcoach is liberating to confide in. I worked on myself and evolved over the decades. Now I am far more experienced in life and therefore able to add value to frustrated married men who want to know how to get intimacy back into marriage or partnership. I helped many to rekindle intimacy in their partnerships. So I’ll always have YOUR interests at heart before mine. And I remind you that you’ll need patience as the wifey or partner won’t change overnight. But patience is a virtue, is it not?
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